no. 457

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."

Groucho Marx

no. 430

"Literary theory is a type of performance art!"

from Zach Weiner's comic Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal.

no. 426

"Well coffee can't be trusted, you know that right?"

Shep, in the comic Road Apples Almanac

no. 405

no. 399

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."

Clarence Darrow

no. 305

"I don't know what makes you tick, but I really hope it's a time bomb"

unknown

no. 197

"The entirety of Dallas's economy is based off of booze, boobs and jesus. When one fails*, it's like hearing that gravity stopped."

Peejee in Randy Milholland's Something Positive.



* referring to a business based on one of the three.

no. 156

"Dont forget to polybag your sad. I'd hate for it to decrease in value"

Peejee, in R. K. Milholland's Something Positive

Whoops! Sorry about the gap, o non-existant readers!

no. 117

"So if guns kill people, I suppose pencils misspell words, cars drive drunk, and spoons make people fat."

(via)

no. 98

"Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter could be said to remedy anything."

Kurt Vonnegut.

Happy Birthday, Mr. Vonnegut. We miss you.

no. 97

"When you cannot joke about the darkness of life, that’s when the darkness takes over."

Amanda Fucking Palmer

no. 49

"Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand."

Mark Twain